Here are just a few things about me that I'm sure you'd like to know.

Name: Selby Aloysius Trifle.

Real Name: I'm not telling.

Breed of dog: Bitser - a bit of this and a bit of that.

Size: Not too big and not too small - just right.

Colour: Yellowy-orange.

Best thing about me: I'm the only talking dog in Australia and perhaps the world.

Age: I'm not sure.

Worst thing about me: I can't swim! I don't know why, but I just can't.

Favourite food: Peanut prawns cooked by Phil Philpot at The Spicy Onion Restaurant.

Least favourite food: Dry-mouth dog biscuits.

Favourite pop-group: The Screaming Mimis.

Favourite thing to do: Lie around doing nothing.
When I get tired of doing nothing, I read fun books and watch TV.

Favourite thing to say when I'm in trouble: 'Oh, woe, woe, woe'.

Person I hate most in the world: Aunt Jetty's dreadful son, Willy.

Person who hates me most in the world: Aunt Jetty’s dreadful son, Willy.
(Her other son, Billy, doesn’t like me much either).

The people I like more than anyone in the universe:
My wonderful owners, Dr and Mrs Trifle.

What I’d like to be: Left alone!